There are so many damn people you would think it’d be easier, but it’s not. What makes New York equally amazing and horrible for dating is the sheer number of options.
Some people are dating purely for the stories, whether they know it or not. In New York, Tinder is so accepted as a means of meeting that elusive attractive individual who lives three blocks from you and ALSO loves hamentashen, you might not even lie to your grandparents about it. There’s a ton of awesome stuff to do in the city, and since you probably have an awesome and more chill time doing it with your established friends, you’re not likely to risk doing anything "fun" on your list with a potentially lame stranger. If the date goes badly, inevitably you end up doing something super awkward like saying goodbye and then walking to the train in the same direction and slowly trying to fall back.
You don’t want to blow it immediately after your first by seeming too eager.
But you don’t want to let too much time pass, either. There’s too much possibility for something better right around the corner.
Or because you really want that summer share in the Hamptons. Maybe you’re a traditionalist and you still believe you can meet someone in Central Park... This can be why most New Yorkers don’t want to commit, because they know that there will always be someone else, theoretically better, right around the corner.
Or someone to call "babe" every Sunday morning at brunch at The Smith. Like, literally, around the corner you can see right now.
And you have to figure out how to get yourself there. Does waiting at the bar with a drink make you look totally chill, or like a raging alcoholic?
And if your neighborhood happens to be more than three stops outside Manhattan? Yes, New Yorkers also pass on prospective mates because they're too nice, needy, live in a neighborhood that’s inconvenient, or are just plain weird. You’re usually meeting at the bar/restaurant/coffee shop. What if it’s one of the eight months a year when it’s freezing or those other four when it’s unbearably humid?
If they offer to meet you at a spot in your neighborhood, even better! (This never happened.) Thinning the herd can also mean dumping the rugby-playing med student because he was super available and attentive.
You aren’t relegated to the movie theater at the local mall, and if you are going to see a movie you can go to places like Nitehawk and eat artisanal cheese while watching it.
Usually the best first dates start with a drink, maybe at a bar in the East Village, where you talk for hours and determine that you both share a love of dim sum and Chinese beer. Then, during the meal, you both discover that you both have stiff shoulders, so it’s off to a massage place on the Lower East Side for cheap massages.